Confused Soul!
Friday……a day of rest for the muslims. People gather at jumma prayers and you see all the brothers in their khamis on their way to drop two for ALLAH. Me personally I hardly go to Friday prayers….most of the time I observe my prayers at home.
It's quite warm here in Mancity today…..its averaging on around 29-30 degrees C. So you can imagine it’s a bit more warmer for us hijabis (but hey…..hell is hotter!).
Today I have an evening shift at work and to be honest I don’t want to go……but I need the money. If I am going to be able to fund my gap year and start paying my debts I might as well stick to it and keep going.
Yesterday after work on my way home (at just past 9pm)…was with NM and S but their bus came and they went home………and I was kinda glad to have sometime with myself actually. However that wouldn’t be the case……instead I was approached by a drunk Somali man. He wouldn’t let get home……infact he followed me all the way there (yea….kinda scary but in a way I was prepared to practice my kickboxing if he played up….how I was going to do that with a skirt I don’t know but I would’ve thought of something). Anyway the brother insisted on having a philosophical conversation on the existence of God with me and why God made me a female and him a male. Here is an excerpt of our convo:
Drunk man: do you believe in God
Me: of course I do. Do you?
Drunk man: yea..
Me: why do believe in God?
Drunk man: because my parents believe in God. Why do you believe in God?
Me: I believe in God because He is the answer to my questions. When I see all that is around me and I wonder how I came to be, my answer is always a higher being is responsible. God is responsible…..
Drunk man: you are not making sense……tell me why you are female and why I’m male?
Me: because ALLAH willed it and wished it. There are some things in life you are not meant to question. Alhamdulillah I am a female……obviously this is what is kheyr for me. ALLAH always give us what is kheyr for us I believe!
At this point I am having a headache from the smell of alcohol……I'm a bit of a lightweight and when I smell alcohol I feel dizzy (sort of what I envision a drunk person feeling after getting hammered).
Drunk man: no-one has ever spoken to me this way…
Me: am sorry for that….I hope I did the right thing
Drunk man: can you help me with the deen?
Me: well I can’t personally help you because I am uncomfortable spending time with a non-mahram but if you are serious about this I can put you in touch with brothers who are more knowledgeable in the deen and can help you.
Drunk man: no……I want your help!
Me: why me specifically?
Drunk man: because I love you and I believe you are an angel…
Me: well thank you….but I am mere human being and am sure after you are sober you will realise you don’t love me.
Drunk man: why do you hate me (crying)
Me: I don’t hate you…..in fact I don’t think I hate anybody in this world
Drunk man: you hate me (still crying)
Me: I don’t know you to hate you. All I know about you is that you are a confused 35 year old drunk. That is not enough for me to form an opinion about you.
Drunk man: I am coming to ask fr your hand in marriage!
Me: stop drinking and try to be a better muslim and you might stand a chance with a muslim girl….
Drunk man: you do hate me!
Me: listen all you have to do is stop drinking because you are killing yourself painfully. Go visit an islam info centre and work for your hearafter.
Drunk man: give me your number.
Me: no I won’t
Drunk man: let me give you mine
Me: there is no point in that because I won’t call you
Drunk man: why
Me: because I don’t want to……listen brother I have been talking to you for nearly an hour and we have been going around in circles. So I am going to go home
Drunk man: no!!
Me: uh…yes I am. So I guess I am wishing kheyr for you and will make dua for you. I hope you do the same for me.
This was the end of it…..I went inside and he left. Then it dawned on me that I asked a drunk man to say dua for me……..
What was heartbreaking about this whole thing was the brother was quoting ayahs of the Quran and translating them for me. He is just a misguided soul who needs help…….I pray that he is able to sort himself out and become a better person.
Another thing NM and I are also having some issues with a new friend. However inshaAllah kheyr. Things will hopefully sort themselves out or we will have the inspiration to sort it out ourselves.
MD has also left us here in Manchester for Alexandria in Egypt. She will spending 6 weeks there learning Arabic she says…..but probably she will having more fun than studying. Lucky girl!
Hopefully if my savings go according to plan I myself might be in Egypt in a few months time……inshaAllah kheyr!
It's quite warm here in Mancity today…..its averaging on around 29-30 degrees C. So you can imagine it’s a bit more warmer for us hijabis (but hey…..hell is hotter!).
Today I have an evening shift at work and to be honest I don’t want to go……but I need the money. If I am going to be able to fund my gap year and start paying my debts I might as well stick to it and keep going.
Yesterday after work on my way home (at just past 9pm)…was with NM and S but their bus came and they went home………and I was kinda glad to have sometime with myself actually. However that wouldn’t be the case……instead I was approached by a drunk Somali man. He wouldn’t let get home……infact he followed me all the way there (yea….kinda scary but in a way I was prepared to practice my kickboxing if he played up….how I was going to do that with a skirt I don’t know but I would’ve thought of something). Anyway the brother insisted on having a philosophical conversation on the existence of God with me and why God made me a female and him a male. Here is an excerpt of our convo:
Drunk man: do you believe in God
Me: of course I do. Do you?
Drunk man: yea..
Me: why do believe in God?
Drunk man: because my parents believe in God. Why do you believe in God?
Me: I believe in God because He is the answer to my questions. When I see all that is around me and I wonder how I came to be, my answer is always a higher being is responsible. God is responsible…..
Drunk man: you are not making sense……tell me why you are female and why I’m male?
Me: because ALLAH willed it and wished it. There are some things in life you are not meant to question. Alhamdulillah I am a female……obviously this is what is kheyr for me. ALLAH always give us what is kheyr for us I believe!
At this point I am having a headache from the smell of alcohol……I'm a bit of a lightweight and when I smell alcohol I feel dizzy (sort of what I envision a drunk person feeling after getting hammered).
Drunk man: no-one has ever spoken to me this way…
Me: am sorry for that….I hope I did the right thing
Drunk man: can you help me with the deen?
Me: well I can’t personally help you because I am uncomfortable spending time with a non-mahram but if you are serious about this I can put you in touch with brothers who are more knowledgeable in the deen and can help you.
Drunk man: no……I want your help!
Me: why me specifically?
Drunk man: because I love you and I believe you are an angel…
Me: well thank you….but I am mere human being and am sure after you are sober you will realise you don’t love me.
Drunk man: why do you hate me (crying)
Me: I don’t hate you…..in fact I don’t think I hate anybody in this world
Drunk man: you hate me (still crying)
Me: I don’t know you to hate you. All I know about you is that you are a confused 35 year old drunk. That is not enough for me to form an opinion about you.
Drunk man: I am coming to ask fr your hand in marriage!
Me: stop drinking and try to be a better muslim and you might stand a chance with a muslim girl….
Drunk man: you do hate me!
Me: listen all you have to do is stop drinking because you are killing yourself painfully. Go visit an islam info centre and work for your hearafter.
Drunk man: give me your number.
Me: no I won’t
Drunk man: let me give you mine
Me: there is no point in that because I won’t call you
Drunk man: why
Me: because I don’t want to……listen brother I have been talking to you for nearly an hour and we have been going around in circles. So I am going to go home
Drunk man: no!!
Me: uh…yes I am. So I guess I am wishing kheyr for you and will make dua for you. I hope you do the same for me.
This was the end of it…..I went inside and he left. Then it dawned on me that I asked a drunk man to say dua for me……..
What was heartbreaking about this whole thing was the brother was quoting ayahs of the Quran and translating them for me. He is just a misguided soul who needs help…….I pray that he is able to sort himself out and become a better person.
Another thing NM and I are also having some issues with a new friend. However inshaAllah kheyr. Things will hopefully sort themselves out or we will have the inspiration to sort it out ourselves.
MD has also left us here in Manchester for Alexandria in Egypt. She will spending 6 weeks there learning Arabic she says…..but probably she will having more fun than studying. Lucky girl!
Hopefully if my savings go according to plan I myself might be in Egypt in a few months time……inshaAllah kheyr!
Labels: Life
Posted by NATIVE at 7/21/2006 02:39:00 PM::
4 Comments:
looooooool, that was really something sis, i;m surprised you spoke to him for that long,
i swear i'm having images of you with a hoody for some reason loool
loool..he wasnt a hoody lool
But did i 4get to mention that on that day i wasnt wearing any black (courtesy of NM) and look where it got....i now know why i like black. lool
looool...yea...that was something!
Me: well thank you….but I am mere human being and am sure after you are sober you will realise you don’t love me.
Drunk man: why do you hate me (crying)
Me: I don’t hate you…..in fact I don’t think I hate anybody in this world
Drunk man: you hate me (still crying)
Me: I don’t know you to hate you. All I know about you is that you are a confused 35 year old drunk. That is not enough for me to form an opinion about you.
Drunk man: I am coming to ask for your hand in marriage!
Lol, That part was interesting...But in all all, do u think this comes from somali and muslim parental obligations right from upbringing their children to counselling them...especially in a non-somali setting..like western countries?
How do you know he is 35?????
he told me he was 35 rendezvous!
that might come from the somali upbringing......interesting point!
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